Hallmark For All Seasons

Everyone’s doing Hallmark Christmas movie rankings this year – so I’m jumping on board! I watched all 38 Hallmark Christmas movies this year (no mean feat but thank heavens for Tivo), and have decided to come out with a ranking of my own.  In ranking the list of movies, I looked at various categories when ranking them:

1) Plot – is the plot something I’d be interested in watching?
2) Actors – do I like the actors who made the movie?
3) Chemistry – do those actors have any chemistry at all?
4) Feelgoods – does this movie make me smile and feel happy when it’s over?
5) Tropes – does it have enough of the Hallmark tropes I have come to know and love?
6) Re-watchability – is it a Christmas movie I’d watch again and again from year to year?

To be honest, there are ten movies that were all completely interchangeable at the bottom. They are movies that were boring, or the actors had no chemistry, or I would never watch again. In no order (because it was impossible) the bottom ten movies of 2018’s Hallmark Christmas season were:

A Gingerbread Romance (Countdown to Christmas): In order to land a huge contract for her firm, an architect (Tia Mowry-Hardrict) must win a life-sized gingerbread house contest – and baker Duane Henry is her only hope.

My opinion: So, so bad.  The only plus was seeing gingerbread houses bigger than some tiny homes I’ve seen on HGTV.

Christmas at Graceland (Countdown to Christmas): A bank executive (Kelly Pickler) is sent back to her hometown of Memphis to land a deal for her company. While staying at Graceland for Christmas, she reconnects with her former singing partner (Wes Brown).

My opinion:  Oh, Pickler.  I wanted to like your movie, but the fact they made Memphis look like a city that suffers heavy snowstorms on the regular made me really dislike this movie.

Last Vermont Christmas (Miracles of Christmas): A woman (Erin Cahill) comes home for the holidays only to find out that her ex (Justin Bruenig) is going to buy her parents’ home, where she and her siblings grew up.

My opinion: This one was just boring and I didn’t care about the family home being sold.

Christmas Wonderland (Miracles of Christmas): An artist (Emily Osment) must travel back to her hometown to take care of her niece and nephew while their parents go on vacation. Oh, and her sister also volunteered her to help out with the local school winter dance – which her ex (Ryan Rottman) is organizing.

My opinion: This one was also incredibly boring.

A Christmas for the Books (Miracles of Christmas): A self-help and Christmas guru (Chelsea Kane) has a radio host (Drew Seeley) pretend to be her boyfriend in order to land a new tv show deal.

My opinion: I liked the actors, but the various romances were convoluted and were more like something out of Nickelodeon versus Hallmark.  This is one that Hallmark should have taken a pass on (it should be noted, this was the last movie to be added to this year’s batch of Christmas movies.  They should have taken “Poinsettias for Christmas” instead, which aired on Lifetime this season and was much, much better).

A Majestic Christmas (Countdown to Christmas): An architect (Jerrika Hinton) returns to her hometown to spearhead the redesign of the town’s theatre, butting heads with the theatre’s new owner (Christian Vincent).

My opinion: The only good things about this movie were Jerrika Hinton (who was great) and the exterior shots of the cute small town theater.

Christmas Joy (Countdown to Christmas): When her aunt gets injured, a woman (Danielle Panabaker) must go to her to take her place in helping a former crush (Matt Long) run the town’s cookie crawl.

My opinion:  Nope.  Just nope.  Boring and completely forgettable.

Entertaining Christmas (Countdown to Christmas): The daughter of a lifestyle guru (Jodie Sweetin) is poised to take the mantle of her mother’s million-dollar business – but first she must plan the homecoming party of a solider who’s coming home for the holidays.

My opinion: I spent more time playing “Candy Crush” on my phone than I did caring about this movie.

Marrying Father Christmas (Miracles of Christmas): After her romantic engagement last Christmas, Miranda (Erin Krakow) prepares to marry Ian (Niall Matter) this Christmas surrounded by his family and her new family.

My opinion:  Perhaps I’d have liked this one more if I saw the first two movies of this trilogy, but I didn’t, so I was not invested in this story at all.

Christmas Made to Order (Countdown to Christmas): An architect (Jonathan Bennett) hires a Christmas coordinator (Alexa PenaVega) to decorate his house and plan activities for his visiting family.

My opinion: There is no way the Christmas coordinator is going to have a career based on what she did to that poor guy’s house.  The kitchen (see below) looked like elves threw up all over it and didn’t clean up the mess.

Movies Middling at Best

After those, we have another 27 movies that I have ranked, and one I did not include (the New Year’s Eve movie, “A Midnight Kiss,” which hasn’t aired yet).  Now here is where I need to admit that that my rankings were likely influenced by my listening to various podcasts about the movies.  Some podcasts were very earnest and heartfelt in their “analysis” and others were snarky and hilarious in theirs.  I likely ranked “Return to Christmas Creek” (#10) a bit higher than I would have had I not listened to Deck the Hallmark’s episode half a dozen times (it’s their funniest episode and well worth the listen even if you have not seen the movie).

27. Christmas Bells are Ringing (Miracles of Christmas) Freelance photographer Sam (Emilie Ullerup) grew up spending summers on Cape Cod, where she and Mike, a local boy (Josh Kelly), became inseparable friends. The untimely death of Sam’s mother brought those summers to an end for Sam, who couldn’t bear the thought of returning. Thirteen years later, they meet again when she returns to Cape Cod for her father’s Christmas Eve wedding.

My opinion: I liked that this movie didn’t just focus on Sam’s love life, but also on her relationship with her dad and his about-to-be-second-wife.  I really like Emilie Ullerup, which is why this movie is not in the lower 10.

26. A Shoe Addict’s Christmas (Countdown to Christmas) Candace Cameron Bure plays a department store HR manager who must help plan a major holiday party for a local fire department while experiencing the past, present and future via a mischievous angel, a la “A Christmas Carol.”

My opinion: The movie was weird, but CCB sometimes picks these weirder fantasy plots (see: 2016’s “Journey Back to Christmas” where she time travels from the 1940s into the present).  This movie’s title implied that she was obsessed with shoes – but was she?  I’d say no.  The shoes were just a plot device for her “Christmas Carol” visions.

25. Welcome to Christmas (Countdown to Christmas) Sent out to a town called Christmas to scout for her resort company, a woman (Jennifer Finnigan) falls in love with the town and the town sheriff (Eric Mabius).

My opinion: Sometimes I like Eric Mabius, sometimes I don’t.  One thing I didn’t like in this movie: his hair.  Ugh.  Get a haircut, Eric.  This one was okay, but not the worst.

24. Time for Me to Come Home for Christmas (Miracles of Christmas) A country star (Josh Henderson) struggling to write his latest hit and a jam maker (Megan Park) trying to save her family’s business are stranded after their flight is diverted for weather; they decide to share the last rental car home to Oklahoma in order to both be home in time for the holiday.

My opinion: I like many things about this movie.  I like Megan Park, and I like a good “two people stranded and trying to get home” Hallmark movie, but this one couldn’t measure up to Hallmark’s all time best “two people stranded and trying to get home” movie, which is 2015’s “A Christmas Detour” starring CCB and Paul Greene.

23. Hope at Christmas (Miracles of Christmas) After inheriting her childhood home, a woman (Scottie Thompson) decides to spend Christmas in the home with her daughter. She meets a handsome teacher (Ryan Paevey) while there.

My opinion: I liked this one more than I thought I would.  Can’t pin why, though.  Would I watch it again?  Probably not.  But I didn’t hate it.

22. Jingle Around the Clock (Countdown to Christmas) A tech expert (Brooke Nevin) and an advertising fixer (Michael Cassidy) must save their company’s social media campaign while competing for the same promotion at work.

My opinion:  This is another one I liked more than I should have, despite not liking the leading man actor that much.

21. Mingle All the Way (Countdown to Christmas) In order to gain more financial backers for her holiday “networking” app, the creator of a startup (Jen Lilley) must become a user – and is paired immediately with the man (Brant Daugherty) she’s had a few not-so-positive run-ins with recently.

My opinion: I really like Jen Lilley (below), so I forgave a lot of what I didn’t like about this movie.  I’d probably watch this one again if nothing else was on TV.

20. When Calls the Heart: The Greatest Christmas Blessing (Countdown to Christmas) A group of orphans become stranded in Hope Valley for Christmas so Abigail (Lori Loughlin) and the other residents rally to make it a Christmas to remember for the orphans. Meanwhile, widowed Elizabeth (Erin Krakow) prepares for the birth of her child.

My opinion:  From a quality standpoint, this was a good one.  And I’m sure the Hallmarkies that watch “When Calls the Heart” loved it.  It was fun to watch merely from the standpoint of seeing SO MANY regular Hallmark movie actors all in one movie.  It was a veritable cavalcade of the Hallmark stable.

19. Reunited at Christmas (Countdown to Christmas) After her boyfriend (Mike Faiola) proposes to her, a woman (Nikki DeLoach) rethinks her quick yes – and the time spent fulfilling her grandmother’s dying wish of a last family Christmas brings her clarity.

My opinion:  This one should really rank higher because it stands out for one reason:  the couple at the centerpoint of this movie are already a couple, and it’s about the boyfriend remaining faithful to her, and continuing to stay with her even after she denies his proposal.  That plotline is RARE in Hallmark and I appreciated how different it was.  I didn’t care for Faiola at the beginning of the movie, but by the end I was a fan.

18. Pride, Prejudice, and Mistletoe (Countdown to Christmas) A stockbroker (Lacey Chabert) goes home for Christmas and helps her mother organize the year’s charity event. The new restaurant owner (Brendan Penny) brought on to cater just so happens to be her high school frenemy, because of course it does.

My opinion: In looking at this list, I think I need to move this one down a bit.  I think I was being generous when I ranked this at #18.  Move it down to #22.  This was not one of Lacey Chabert’s best Hallmark Christmas movies (that would be 2012’s “Matchmaker Santa”).  Also? The tie-in to Jane Austen was pointless and not even referenced in the movie.

17. Memories of Christmas (Miracles of Christmas) A businesswoman (Christina Milian) returns home after her mother’s death and finds love and the spirit of Christmas, while remembering her mother and the time of year she loved the most.

My opinion:  The only reason this movie ranked this high was Christina Milian, who is fun to watch.  Have you seen her in 2007’s “Snowglobe”?  That’s pure fun and involves her getting transported into a snowglobe.  This movie was not as whimsical, but she was still great.

16. Christmas on Honeysuckle Lane (Miracles of Christmas) A woman (Alicia Witt) and her siblings spend one last Christmas together before selling their parents’ house.

My opinion: To be honest, I’m surprised this movie ranked as high as it did.  I am not a huge fan of Alicia Witt, and yet two of her other Hallmark Christmas movies are ones that I’ve watched multiple times (2013’s “A Very Merry Mix-Up” and 2017’s “The Mistletoe Inn”). And while this one was VERY schmaltzy, it was better than a lot of other movies, and so it ranks higher than I would have expected.

15. Christmas in Love (Countdown to Christmas) When the heir to a baking company (Daniel Lissing) comes into town as a rite of passage, the HR manager of the company’s kringle bakery (Brooke D’Orsay) must convince him that automation isn’t the way to go.

My opinion: I just have one word: Kringles!  I liked this one and might even watch it again if it repeats.  Do I believe Daniel Lissing as a young exec about to inherit his father’s company?  NO WAY.  But Brooke D’Orsay is great and I liked this movie.

14. Christmas at the Palace (Countdown to Christmas) A former figure skater (Merritt Patterson) stumbles upon the king of a small European country (Andrew Cooper) while in town for her Ice Capades-like employer and is convinced to help organize the country’s ice show.

My opinion: Every Christmas we have to have at least one “future king of random country that ends in -donia meets poor American girl” movie, and this was it.  Plot holes galore in this one, but most Hallmark fans are suckers for Princess movies, which means I guess I’m a sucker for a Princess movie too (although I think most will agree the best one is 2015’s “Crown for Christmas” starring Danica McKellar and Rupert Penry-Jones).

13. A Veteran’s Christmas (Miracles of Christmas) A veteran (Eloise Mumford) returns from overseas (where she had to leave the dog she had trained) and before starting a new job, takes a road trip. After a minor car accident, she’s stuck in a small town – where the local judge (Sean Faris) has a spare room.

My opinion: I knew what would happen in the end, and yet that didn’t stop me from tearing up when it happened.  For that alone, this one ranks high and I’d probably watch it again.

12. Road to Christmas (Countdown to Christmas) The producer of a lifestyle brand show (Jessy Schram) is forced to work with the show’s host’s son (Chad Michael Murray) in order to pull of the first live Christmas tv show in the brand’s history.

My opinion: I remember the Deck the Hallmark guys getting into a debate over whether the three brothers represented the Wise Men from the biblical story.  Turns out, this move was originally called “The Wise Men,” so I’d say that answers that question.  I like Jessy Schram, and liked this movie.  Not enough to have it crack the top 10, but enough that it ranks pretty high and I’d definitely watch it again.

11. Once Upon a Christmas Miracle (Miracles of Christmas) Based on a true story, when a nursing student (Aimee Teegarden) is diagnosed with a deadly disease and needs a kidney transplant, a recently returned serviceman (Brett Dalton) is her perfect match.

My opinion: While I don’t know that I’d watch this one again (it was much more serious than a typical Hallmark holiday movie), this movie was based on a true story and was very touching.  For that reason alone it ranks high.  It was nice to see Aimee Teegarden on my TV again (clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose) and while the leads didn’t really have any chemistry on screen, it was still a good movie.

The Top Ten, y’all!

Then we come to my top ten.  With this top ten, we have stories which I liked/loved, actors I enjoy/adore, my favorite Hallmark tropes, and in some cases, really good chemistry between the lead actors.  Would I watch them again?  These are all the movies that I would definitely watch again – and in at least one case, I’ve already watched it FOUR TIMES (surprisingly, though, it is not my number 1 pick).

10. Return to Christmas Creek (Miracles of Christmas)

A woman (Tori Anderson) returns to her childhood home to visit her Uncle, and rediscovers her Christmas spirit (and heals the rift between her dad and uncle).

My opinion: I have to admit that the MAIN Reason this ranks so high is the fact that the episode of “Deck the Hallmark Podcast” that talks about this movie is my favorite of the entire season.  Between their riffs on how to fly a plane, Great Danes, Presents vs. Presence, and getting chicken parmigiana at The Mistletoe, it is hands down one of the funniest things I’ve ever listened to.  Result?  I have special affection for this movie, which actually would have ranked pretty high anyway because it was pretty good.

9. It’s Christmas, Eve (Countdown to Christmas)

A woman (Leeann Rimes) comes home for Christmas having been named her local high school’s interim superintendent. After trying to make some tough budget decisions, the school’s music teacher (Tyler Hines) convinces her they can stage a Christmas pageant to raise the money they need.

My opinion: I don’t listen to country music, and therefore am not a Leeann Rimes fan, but she did a solid job and I thought this was a great addition to the Hallmark roster.  Was it predictable?  Oh yeah – absolutely.  Was it farfetched?  100%.  But I still liked it.

8. Homegrown Christmas (Countdown to Christmas)

A shoe designer (Lori Loughlin) returns home after selling her business and must attempt to fit in with her family and the man she left behind (Victor Webster).

My opinion: I liked this movie a lot more than I expected.  Lori Loughlin was great, and I’m becoming a big fan of Victor Webster (and not just because of his salt & pepper hair).  I have to say the one thing I appreciate about Hallmark movies is that they don’t all start young 20-somethings with whom I cannot relate at all. Loughlin is in her mid-50s, and Webster in his late 40s.  I like that very much, Hallmark.  Thank you.

7. Christmas Everlasting (Hallmark Hall of Fame) (Countdown to Christmas)

After her sister leaves her a house in her will, a woman (Tatiana Ali) must live there as a term of the will before she can sell it. While spending time in the house, she learns about the impact of her sister’s life on others.

My opinion: I was surprised that this one ranked as high as it did.  At the time I watched it I didn’t think it would even crack my Top 10.  But then we got a plethora of really boring run-of-the-mill movies and this one slowly crept up the ladder until it hit #7.  Tatiana Ali was fabulous, and the story less romance and more drama (thus the “Hall of Fame” designation).  This may be the one movie in the top ten I don’t watch on constant repeat (because it is a drama), but it was a solid story, with great acting, great chemistry between the actors, and a satisfying (albeit predictable) ending.

6. Christmas at Grand Valley (Miracles of Christmas)

Danica McKellar plays a struggling artist who goes home to Grand Valley at Christmas. After getting roped to run the local lodge’s Kids Christmas Camp, she falls for the father of two of her campers (Brennan Elliott) – who just so happens to be working for the company planning on selling the Lodge to outside developers.

My opinion: Here is where I admit that Brennan Elliott is one of my favorite Hallmark actors (and TV actors in general – he was in “The 4400” which is a show I loved).  If I see he’s in a movie on Hallmark, I make a point to watch it.  Having said that, WHAT WAS UP with his haircut in this movie?  It was awful.  (ok maybe I’m being harsh – I won’t say it was awful. Just not a style I prefer on him.) What was not awful?  The movie itself.  Sweet, romantic, and charming.  Everything a Hallmark movie should be.  It was a typical “Big city developer wants to buy a small town resort” plotline, but Elliott and co-star Danica McKellar are solid and have good chemistry.

5. A Godwink Christmas (Miracles of Christmas)

An engaged woman (Kimberly Sustad) visits her aunt (Kathie Lee Gifford) before Christmas and gets stranded in Nantucket. She stays at a B&B run by a man (Paul Campbell) who a few years ago left a big city life to run this inn.

My opinion: And here is where I admit that Paul Campbell is another one of my favorite Hallmark actors (if you get a chance to see 2013’s “Window Wonderland” you’ll see why I like him so much).  I follow him on Twitter and Instagram and he seems just as lovely and goofy as the character he plays in that movie.  Since I’m such a big fan of Campbell’s, I suspect that’s why this movie ranked so high.  In fact, my entire Top 5 consists of actors that I love and would watch anything they do.  “Godwink” is also based on a true story (which I didn’t realize until the closing credits), and Campbell and Kimberly Sustad had pretty good chemistry.  Worth watching for the two actors, even if the movie itself had some failings.

4. Christmas at Pemberley Manor (Countdown to Christmas)

A party planner (Jessica Lowndes) is contracted to run a small town’s Christmas festival – and the only place to hold a lot of the events is an estate owned by a smug businessman (Michael Rady).

My opinion: This movie is the movie in which Christmas threw up all over the script.  This was the premiere movie of this Hallmark season and WOW is it Christmas-y.  It also features Michael Rady (who stars in one of my favorite Hallmark Christmas movies of all time, 2016’s “Christmas in Homestead”), and who looks MUCH better in a beard than not.  And while this Jane Austen homage has many more connections to Austen than my #18 pick, they are very loose and unnecessary.  Despite this, I liked the movie and will definitely watch it again.  I wasn’t a huge Jessica Lowndes fan a few years ago, but she’s starting to grow on me.

3. Small Town Christmas (Miracles of Christmas)

Years after she learned about it in New York, an author (Ashley Newbrough) of a new bestseller finally visits the town that inspired her book – only to find that the former co-worker (and crush) (Kristoffer Polaha) who told her about the town years earlier is now the owner of the town’s bookstore.

My opinion: Given how much I love Kris Polaha, you’d think this would be my number one movie of the season.  Given the fact I’ve watched it no less than 4 times already, you’d think this would be my number one movie.  Given the fact that Polaha is channeling Jimmy Stewart as George Bailey from “It’s a Wonderful Life,” you’d think this would be my number one movie.  But it actually came in at number three.  No one was more shocked than me!  I love this movie.  Sure, there are questions that go unanswered, and I didn’t particularly care for the female lead in the movie (she was fine but I didn’t see her as a match for Polaha), but I was still completely charmed by this movie – and it’s all down to Polaha himself.  Love him.  Always will.

2. Christmas in Evergreen: Letters to Santa (Countdown to Christmas)

When she has a break for the holiday, a store stager (Jill Wagner) returns to her childhood town and tries to find a buyer for the local general store alongside the local handyman.

My opinion: This is a sequel of sorts to the original “Christmas in Evergreen” (2017) starring Ashley Williams, who I simply adore.  She is effervescent and charming and thoroughly likeable.  “CiE” is another one of my all-time favorite Hallmark Christmas movies, and so I had high hopes for the sequel, starring Jill Wagner.  Let me say that Jill Wagner is another one of those effervescent, charming and thoroughly likeable actresses (her turn with Kris Polaha in “Pearls in Paradise” is fantastic).  And because I have such love for “CiE” and because I have such affection for Jill Wagner, this movie had me from the opening scene.  I loved every minute of it and my Tivo is already set to record it again this week so that I can watch it again.

1. Northern Lights of Christmas (Miracles of Christmas)

A pilot (Ashley Williams) inherits an Alaska farmhouse and two reindeer from the man who taught her how to fly – and she must decide whether to sell or to stay.

My opinion: Simply the best.  I had a smile on my face throughout most of this movie mainly because Ashley Williams is simply the best.  Candace Cameron Bure may be the Queen of Hallmark, but Ashley Williams has her beat when it comes to pure joy on screen.  No, the reindeer don’t fly, but this movie (despite horrific green screen of the aurora borealis) is made wonderful simply because Ashley Williams is the best.

Special non-Hallmark mentions:

The Christmas Contract – aired on Lifetime – features a plethora of “One Tree Hill” stars.   I did not watch “OTH” but I know a lot of people who loved that show and were very excited about this movie.  I really, really liked this movie and it took me forever to realize that the leading man is also in “iZombie,” which I enjoyed for a couple seasons.  This was one of my favorites of the entire Christmas movie assortment this year.

Poinsettias for Christmas – aired on Lifetime – also features an actress from “OTH.” As I already said in my blurb about “A Christmas for the Books”, I liked *this* movie a lot and feel that Hallmark should have nabbed this one to be their 38th movie, if it was offered to them.  Maybe it wasn’t even offered to Hallmark, but it was definitely worth the network buying it.

A Christmas in Tennessee – aired on Lifetime – two of my favorite Hallmark actors ‘cheated’ on the network and went with Lifetime movies this year.  Rachel Boston and Andrew Walker were great even if the movie had some crazy plotholes.

The Christmas Chronicles – aired on Netflix – Kurt Russell stars as Santa Clause in this delightful new addition to the Christmas movie catalog, and this is one that I will watch every year.  Not a romance movie, but a family film and one I thoroughly enjoyed.

A Christmas Prince – aired on Netflix in 2017 – I only watched this one in 2018 and it ranks right up there with your typical Hallmark offering.

And there you have it, my complete ranking.  I told CootieGirl last night that next year I’ll have worksheets with a point system for each category so that I can get a true accounting of how to rank the movies that I watch.  Might as well make it a bit more scientific.

What holiday movies did you watch and enjoy this year?  Did I rank anything in a way you disagree with?  Comment and let me know your picks for the best of the best this season!